About fifteen or twenty years ago, I competed in a team (three-women) ironman triathlon after I had started. My swimmer was too fast. I had gone an extra twelve miles. Due to the fact that I am a competitive person, and knew I already had extra mileage ahead of me, I rode mad for the first half of the race. This reminds me that when we go too fast, racing the road of life instead of waiting and checking to see if we're going the right way, it doesn't always serve us well.
competition. I was the biker (not in the photo - that's just a stock one - they're way cooler looking). After completing her leg of the race, our stud swimmer was the first one out of the water. This put me in first position as I took off on the 112-mile race through the beautifully uncluttered, farmy-smelling roads of southern Wisconsin. After several miles, I noticed that I was not seeing any road markings or people and a sense of discomfort in my gut began to take over. I made the decision to turn around, return to where I started (if I could find it), and see where I may have gone wrong, if that, in fact, was the case. It was. The beginning of the course had not been marked until
I think I noticed my lack of natural ability to slow down and wait when I was around eight and raced my friend in her porch. I wanted to win so badly that I did not decelerate when I came to the cement wall. I won! Then I ended up on her mom's bed, and eventually the ER with stitches in my forehead.
Earlier this year, I heard someone say that we have a God who runs on the timetable of a turtle. From the perspective of the hare that I am, I agree. Safe Families for Children has been transformational for me because that is when I began to learn the benefits of going from racing to resting. It was my cocoon. After multitudes of injuries took me out of the game, I listened to God and sat with a child instead - unnoticed by others (a new thing for me). It got me away from trying to prove my worth and showed me how to sit in my worthiness. It also got me on my knees pleading to God to take this cup away from me when I wanted to throw in the towel, and eventually it reminded me the second half of that prayer - "yet not my will, but yours be done" (Luke 22:42). Ewe.
After attending a Leadership Summit this summer, I learned why I gained so much from this transition: When we stop running, we find out so much more about ourselves because we stop running from our True Self. Racing, for me, was my self-protective effort to avoid. Resting, being quiet, serving someone without anyone watching but My Father, showed me who I really was.
While I still seem to find myself begging God to take things away or change them instead of asking for strength to wait and openness to be transformed, I am slowly learning to let go of wanting my own way as soon as possible and just fall onto the back of the tortoise. It helps knowing that I can stop the striving and be carried. I am learning that I cannot race through life and be who God wants me to be. If we continually seek escape from what is hard because we want our own way now, we may, like in my bike and foot race, end up going the wrong way, getting hurt, or not becoming who we were created to be.
Matthew 6 talks about performing for the approval of men or doing things in secret to get rewarded
by God. While I realize that these verses refer to giving, they really can be applied to anything we do. This is the difference I learned, and re-learn every day, when I moved from racing to resting. We do not gain eternal rewards from seeking man's approval. We gain these rewards when we seek God's approval (sometimes they are seen now and sometimes not for a long time). But it usually takes waiting and going into our cocoon (in solitude or serving without others noticing). And then...
I think I noticed my lack of natural ability to slow down and wait when I was around eight and raced my friend in her porch. I wanted to win so badly that I did not decelerate when I came to the cement wall. I won! Then I ended up on her mom's bed, and eventually the ER with stitches in my forehead.
Earlier this year, I heard someone say that we have a God who runs on the timetable of a turtle. From the perspective of the hare that I am, I agree. Safe Families for Children has been transformational for me because that is when I began to learn the benefits of going from racing to resting. It was my cocoon. After multitudes of injuries took me out of the game, I listened to God and sat with a child instead - unnoticed by others (a new thing for me). It got me away from trying to prove my worth and showed me how to sit in my worthiness. It also got me on my knees pleading to God to take this cup away from me when I wanted to throw in the towel, and eventually it reminded me the second half of that prayer - "yet not my will, but yours be done" (Luke 22:42). Ewe.
After attending a Leadership Summit this summer, I learned why I gained so much from this transition: When we stop running, we find out so much more about ourselves because we stop running from our True Self. Racing, for me, was my self-protective effort to avoid. Resting, being quiet, serving someone without anyone watching but My Father, showed me who I really was.
While I still seem to find myself begging God to take things away or change them instead of asking for strength to wait and openness to be transformed, I am slowly learning to let go of wanting my own way as soon as possible and just fall onto the back of the tortoise. It helps knowing that I can stop the striving and be carried. I am learning that I cannot race through life and be who God wants me to be. If we continually seek escape from what is hard because we want our own way now, we may, like in my bike and foot race, end up going the wrong way, getting hurt, or not becoming who we were created to be.
Matthew 6 talks about performing for the approval of men or doing things in secret to get rewarded
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